SOME QUICK PERSPECTIVES
It's not whether you win or lose, but how you place the blame.
You are not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
We have enough "youth". How about a fountain of "smart"?
The original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson.
A fool and his money can throw one heck of a party.
Learn from your parents’ mistakes. Use birth control.
Money isn't everything, but it sure keeps the kids in touch.
Don't drink and drive. You might hit a bump and spill something.
Reality is only an illusion that occurs due to a lack of alcohol.
We are born naked, wet and hungry. Then things get worse.
Red meat is not bad for you. Fuzzy green meat is bad for you.
Xerox and Wurlitzer will merge to produce reproductive organs.
Artificial Intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
You know why a politician is like a banana?
He comes in green, then he turns yellow, and then he's rotten.
Politicians should wear uniforms, you know, like NASCAR drivers, so we could identify their corporate sponsors.
The reason politicians try so hard to get re-elected is that they would hate to have to make a living under the laws they've passed.
|
|
|
